Moaning Myrtle

Well my head feels like its about to explode. I’ve had to start planning out what I eat again to ensure I get enough as I was starving on the plan I was following previously..thank you jk I hate you. I was going to try and just stick it out as I really didn’t want to go back to doing it all myself (through fear of doing it wrong and of becoming obsessive again) but I was SO grouchy all day, crying for no reason, constantly checking the time to see when I could have my next meal and I just thought, this feels like those days when I was restricting and trying to lose weight! So I had to do something.

Now I remember why I was so hesitant to plan it out stress levels are THROUGH THE ROOF. Its an absolute bloody nightmare but if I don’t do it and just eat intuitively, or ‘count as I go’ the weight just drops i’m left with no choice for the time being until another option or answer presents itself to me.

In other news its been over 32hrs since my last cigarette (which may be contributing slightly to the stress levels) but i’ve got this far i’m not wasting money on tobacco to feel a little better temporarily but be left with the same problems when I stub it out. Not to mention last night drove me up the wall..the hostel has never been so busy! Making tea was mission impossible as what I can only assume to be a school trip..unless the Von Trapp family and the cast of Cheaper by the Dozen have joined forces to travel europe..took over the kitchen. Im not kidding, they made up around half of the french population and there wasnt a single pan, plate, fork or even a seat for the likes of little old me.

Ohh la la…get me home!

Emma xo


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